Privilege

While on a recent vacation in Europe, I found that there are, generally, two types of Americans who travel abroad.

The first type tends to be polite, use their indoor voices, and are keen to discover new places, cultures, and people, and learn about foreign countries from a different perspective to what they’ve learned stateside.

They may try to learn at least a little of a foreign language when possible, and they willingly acknowledge that the whole world is not English-speaking.

The second type tends to believe money talks. Regardless of their economic status, these people have reached the point of being able to afford a European vacation, whether they’re company CEOs or they’ve saved for the vacation of a lifetime.

Having reached this status, they often exhibit a sense of entitlement. I call them The Privileged, “knock this chip off my shoulder” type. They are American in all caps.

This second group is often loud, quick to take offense when things don’t go their way, and appear to think they already know everything about the places they’re visiting and the people who live there. They are looking to have their opinions reinforced.

They also are likely to have the attitude that everyone in the world speaks English; foreigners simply pretend they don’t to make things difficult.

I know what you’re thinking: these are stereotypes. No one is exactly like either of these descriptions. But stereotypes are based in reality, even if they take it to the extreme.

I have met people who fit very neatly into each of those categories.

Most people are a combination of the two, and depending on how the day is going for them, show more of one or the other.

Those who exhibit more characteristics of the second type are the ones who embarrass the rest of us. They also tend to be the ones Europeans remember as Americans.

We’ve all had an “ugly American” moment when weather, disappointment or the hassle of packing and moving from place to place just gets to us.

The problem is that many Americans look on this not as rude but as “just having a bad day,” with no explanation or apology necessary. Some people act as if it is our right as Americans to expect the best, and insist that we get it.

I have seen this so much when traveling that it is refreshing to find Americans who are empathetic, polite and considerate of those from different cultures.

Yes, we’re considerate – usually – with other Americans, but we can often be more abrupt than those of other cultures are used to.

The “This is who I am; get over it” attitude is precisely what Europeans find distasteful.

The attitude doesn’t end when Americans come home, either.

Those who cater to the tourist industry welcome having their guests leave comments on sites such as Trip Advisor.

I use this site to help decide where to book when I’m planning a vacation. And I leave comments about the places I’ve stayed, as well.

I admit, I have few requirements: clean sheets and towels, a working shower and a bed with no bedbugs. While a television is a nice touch, and these days expected, unless I’m traveling alone, I probably won’t turn it on, especially in a non-English-speaking country.

While a dripping faucet or a drafty window can be irritating enough to disturb sleep, other things people complain about (drab curtains, tired carpets or even a creaky floor) make me shake my head.

I once traveled in a group where one woman complained that the walls in her room were dirty! This was in a new hotel, and no one else had that experience.

Sure, mentioning that the rooms could use an update might be a valid suggestion. But some people seem to have nothing to say except whether or not they liked the color of the room, the carpet or the lighting fixtures, and then give a low rating as if they worked for Queer Eye for the B&B. They say nothing of comfort, security or the quiet factor of the room.

I once stayed in a B&B where I’d read the complaints about the layout of the bathroom. (It had one; I was good with that.) The main issue was that there was only about 2 feet between the sink and the door. It was a single room. I found the distance adequate to get from the toilet on one side to the shower on the other. When I reviewed it, I suggested that people who found it too narrow a space simply leave the door open. It was a single room, after all.

I’ve also read reviews from Americans who ripped a B&B to shreds because the batteries in the remote for the TV were dead.

Really? Did you ask for new ones?

The management doesn’t generally know about these issues unless a guest mentions it. Maids are there to clean, not check TV remotes.

My experience, whether with a B&B or a hotel, is that management is more than willing, with great apology, to quickly remedy issues like batteries, towels and assorted other problems. They will work with guests to make accommodations on things that can’t immediately be fixed, like Wi-Fi dead spots. But the guest needs to speak up.

I find it odd that the Americans who are willing to loudly complain about cultural differences will wait until they get home and put issues like batteries in their complaints about their accommodations.

It’s true that Europeans can also be critical of places to stay. But on the whole, they tend not to be as harsh in their ratings over minor inconveniences.

My attitude when traveling is that, like it or not, I am representing my country when I travel abroad. My behavior will affect how others view Americans.

Do I always behave like the model tourist? Admittedly, no. But I do try, and when I fail, I try to make amends.

A European vacation is an opportunity to learn new things, and I try to learn as much as possible.

Americans who can afford to vacation in Europe should not use that as an opportunity for arrogance.

An American tourist should not expect better treatment simply because of national origin.  Because of some tourists, the reverse might end up being the case in some places.

You are not just a guest in another country. You are an advertisement for whether or not others should come to visit America.

The only privilege should be the chance to see new places and learn new things. It should not be a guest’s expectation of entitlement simply for having been born in a land of opportunity.